metanoia's Diaryland Diary

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The ashes are in da house!

This entry is an edited letter I wrote to my cousin, Dee. She is in her 70�s and her health is failing. This is really like an installment of a story I can not complete, until she has passed away. Part of the story is the reason behind this letter. The ashes I speak of are those of my eldest brother, who died a couple of years ago. I suppose I could tell the story of how his ashes made the trek from Palm Springs to Atlanta and ended up in that crazy fag�s hands (I am not anti-gay, but this guy gives homo�s a bad name), and so I will� but not tonight.

�Dear Dee, The good news is I finally have Larry's ashes here with me. They are in my possession. I met Paul last weekend and picked them up. It has been almost a year since I have been trying to get with Paul to pick them up. HE NEVER RETURNED MY CALLS!!!!!! I called religiously every week or two to arrange a time to meet with him to pick them up. I would leave my work number, my cell number, my home number every time.... No call. Nothing. I never lost my cool with him because I was afraid he might do something to the ashes for spite or something. Around Christmas I called Gina and mentioned it to her, hoping she shed some light on why in the world he would not return my call or leave a message or anything (she could not and seemed as bewildered as I was as to why he would not call), and hoping she might be able to put some pressure on him to call me. She called me a few weeks ago and said she spoke with him and he told her he still had them, but she said she could not get him to commit to contacting me.... I HATE THAT FUCKING FAG! I sent him a Christmas card with my business card in it with all my numbers and my email address on it. Nothing. After the holidays I decided I would step up my efforts to get the ashes, I even planned on getting a deputy marshall to accompany me, if necessary. It was just so ridiculous. But, then I had an idea. The next time I called, my message was "Hi, Paul. It's Lisa again. I am so disappointed we can not seem to connect. I was worried but spoke with Gina and she said you were well and doing fine. I plan to be in Atlanta quite a bit in the next couple of months and so I think I will just stop by whenever I am in town and hope to catch you or Soren at home. Please let Soren know where the ashes and pictures are that are mine in case you are not there when I stop by. My number at work is xxx-xxx-xxxx, you can leave a message there 24/7 and I will get it. My home number is....."

I ran out of message space and hung up. I planned to call right back and leave the rest of my numbers but I was at work and got a call. By the time I called him back it was 10 minutes later.... and guess what. He answered his fucking phone. Finally. After over 9 months!!!! I figure he had time to listen to my message and freak out that I was just going to drop by unannounced or something and decided to take my call..., the bastard! This was a week ago Thursday and he said he would be available on Saturday - of course I said fine. I wasn't going to let him back out if it wasn't convenient for me.

I called K and told him we are going to Atlanta Saturday and explained things. I prayed Paul wouldn't screw me and not be there. He was there, we were pleasant as we could be, stayed 5 minutes got Larry and pictures and we were gone.

I still have no clue why he did not call me all those months. He either had some power trip going or he did not want me to see his little shithole where he is living. It's over and I am glad.

So, I kept expecting that he would call me and I could tell you I had the ashes... but the little shit never called until I had to be manipulative and conniving. I hate being manipulative and conniving.... but I can do it if I have to.

ANYWAY. That's the story. I AM VICTORIOUS!!!�

This experience reinforced my confidence in my essential manipulative and conniving nature� It felt great.

9:38 p.m. - 2008-05-28

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