metanoia's Diaryland Diary

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BPBPBPBPBP

I have had a crappy morning. I slept so well last night and awoke so rested and then began thinking of my high BP, which probably raised my BP� I checked it myself this morning and it was lower.

But now as I return from dr office it was still elevated there. After I had a confrontation with a surly receptionist, they took my BP. I may be grasping at straws for reasons that my BP is high, but damn! I know her crappy attitude didn�t help me.

I am so depressed and sad about this. I just feel like shit. My eye is still bloodshot. I may go to see eye doctor� that is kind of worrying me� Worry, worry, worry! Me of no worries is now miss worry-wart. I am a worry wart. Fuck.

What happened to me? Who am I? Who is this person whose life I am living? I guess this is what happens when delusion and reality collide�

BPBPBPBPBPBPBP. I have got to fill my life with something besides this. I know, I�ll think about it tomorrow�.

Christmas is coming and I just found out I get both Thursday and Friday off! Yahoo! That is such a good thing�.

OK. I guess I just don�t feel like writing much.

I do want to say, though, that lately I have been feeling very organized and effective in my life. So, I�ve got it all together now, but my body is falling apart. How perfect is that? There�s always something�.

10:23 a.m. - 2004-12-16

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